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Fic: [SGA] Seeds of Fear

Title: Seeds of Fear
Author: skinscript
Rating: G
Genre: General
Spoilers: The Seed (5x02)
Wordcount: 900
Disclaimer: Seriously?
Posted at: sga_episodefic, mckay_sheppard

Summary: The Seed episode tag.




It took John three days to realise that Rodney was avoiding him.

Since he spent all three of those days in the infirmary (as well as the next six) recovering from being impaled by a *vine* of all things, it was perhaps understandable that it took him a while to notice. Then, he actually found it a little restful for a bit.

But apparently, Rodney was just waiting for him to regain enough strength from surviving his botanical evisceration to be able to handle the verbal one.

"So, what, now? Your fucking death wish is back? Well, I gotta tell you Colonel, I'm on the edge of killing you myself with the *sheer power of my rage*." Rodney backed him up against the edge of his bed, placed both hands on his chest, and *shoved*.

Jesus, Rodney was strong.

John sat down a lot more abruptly than he would have liked, staring up at Rodney with a combination of surprised and pissed. After a moment, pissed won.

"I don't have a death wish," he shot back coldly. "But evidently *you* do."

"Ha!" Rodney didn't give an inch, just stood over him with fists clenched and arms crossed. He looked like he was holding back his desire to do physical damage by the very tips of his fingernails.

"Rodney," John shook his head and pushed to his feet, knocking Rodney back a step with the pressure of his body. "I don't know what brought this on, but seriously, you need to knock it off right now."

Rodney choked. "Don't know what brought this *on*? How about your imbecilic desire to ram a jumper through the side of a building, into a wraith-bio-infested *room*, all alone?"

"Look, it was the only way to help Keller and you know it," John began evenly.

"There were other ways. But you were too busy racing off to play sacrificial hero to hear any of them, weren't you? Oh, oh! And I loved you taking off while I was locked in my quarters under fucking Marine guard, by the way. Especially the little 'keep him here' on the way out the door. That was just *great*."

John's chin lifted defensively in a gesture he recognized but was helpless to stop. "My call, Rodney."

Rodney stared at him with betrayal and fury turning his eyes an even darker blue than normal, scanning his face searchingly. Suddenly, incongrously, his face softened. "You think I don't know what this is really about?" he asked gently. John stepped back rapidly, more unnerved by Rodney's kindness and understanding than he had ever been by his anger. He forgot about the bed right behind him, tripped, and ended up sitting down hard. Again. Rodney moved to stand directly in front of him, preventing him from getting back up.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he ground out, escape thwarted.

"No idea." Rodney glared at him through narrowed lids. "What happened in the future, John? What did you learn about what happened to us?"

John compressed his lips and seriously considered drawing his sidearm to back Rodney up. "You were at the debriefing. You already know."

"I don't think you told us nearly as much as you know. Pretty much just that you knew where Teyla was, and that I'd left you a message and told you how to get back. I'll bet there's a lot more to the story." His blue eyes were sharp, gauging the effect of his words. "Forty eight thousand years. Atlantis deserted. And all of us, dead."

John winced. Rodney nodded, those damned sharp eyes seeing too goddamned much.

"All dead. And not a damned thing you could do about it. It happened when you weren't even looking, while you were incapacitated." Rodney's lips pulled back from his teeth in something that could never be considered a smile. "You blinked, and we were gone."

"So what?" John bit back a surge of nausea at Rodney's words. It was just part of recovering from his wounds, that was all. He felt himself pale, decided to go with anger. "You're all alive now."

"Ah, yes," Rodney stepped back and nodded wisely at him. "But, for how long?"

"What?"

"We're in a dangerous place. We put ourselves in dangerous situations all the time." He crossed his arms. "Probably better if you just take all the risks for us, right? Won't we be safer then?" His face was turning red.

"You're insane." The nausea had changed to outright pain, and John fought the desire to curl around his stomach, just a little.

"If I am, you drove me there." Rodney spun on his heel and headed for the door. "Sadly, you're right. It *is* your call. I can't stop you from being stupid, but I know what you're doing. I'm going to do everything I can to stop you from actually managing to get yourself killed trying to keep all the risks for yourself."

The door closed behind him.

John stood up, walked over to his desk, very deliberately picked up his coffee mug... and threw it against the wall. It exploded into tiny splinters, one flying back and nicking the skin over his cheekbone, the rest puffing out in a cloud of dust and a rattle of debris. His breath rasped in his chest, and John shook with the effort of restraining the rest of the violence coursing through him.

"Yeah, well," he gritted out. "You can try."

-30-


A/N: The super!John of the first two episodes really drove me nuts. Then I figured out, at least to my own mind, WHY. And now I feel better. :)

Comments

( 27 comments — Leave a comment )
unaccompanied_g
Jul. 26th, 2008 10:56 pm (UTC)
Oh, thank you for this! I, too, was irritated by super!John, so this made it better. ♥
skinscript
Jul. 27th, 2008 01:04 am (UTC)
You're welcome!

I have to keep reminding myself that John's the lead and so he's supposed to always save the day. I just really hope they don't Gary Stu him. I like liking Shep!
erda_3
Jul. 27th, 2008 04:15 am (UTC)
I agree that John has been over the top, so I love your take on this.

Very nice angst for a short piece.
rohaa
Jul. 27th, 2008 07:30 am (UTC)
Also agreed, John in the first three eps: seriously overdone super!John. It's like he's a) in the infirmary, or b) saving the day, or c) BOTH.

Let off already.
rohaa
Jul. 27th, 2008 07:31 am (UTC)
Oh and I completely forgot to say: NICE ficcie, this does give the whole super!john a reason, and I liked it!
skinscript
Jul. 27th, 2008 10:42 pm (UTC)
Thank you! And yes - I've been spending quite a bit of time muttering at the writers recently. At the same time I realise that I would likely be just as for it if it were Rodney saving the day *laughs*
rohaa
Jul. 28th, 2008 07:02 am (UTC)
Well yes, if we're going to be all honest, Rodney does do more than his fair share of saving the day, but he doesn't do it in such a testosterone bomb way, so I don't mind :P *grin*

*clearly has a thing for Rodney*
skinscript
Jul. 31st, 2008 01:45 am (UTC)
That is because Rodney is the *man*. :)
rohaa
Jul. 31st, 2008 06:58 am (UTC)
With a *brain* no less.

*swoons*
skinscript
Jul. 27th, 2008 10:41 pm (UTC)
Thank you!

He was a lot better in ep 3, I thought. I *want* to like John, so I really needed a reason! :)
gwendolynflight
Jul. 27th, 2008 06:29 am (UTC)
Man, you really have a handle on Sheppard's mind frame in those first two episodes. Great fic!
skinscript
Jul. 27th, 2008 10:42 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
taste_is_sweet
Jul. 27th, 2008 03:15 pm (UTC)
Wow, that explains so much! (Except how he could possibly have bounced back from being stabbed in the abdomen in less than a month, apparently, but that's not your fault.::g::.) Excellent story, and very satisfying. Thank you.
skinscript
Jul. 27th, 2008 10:45 pm (UTC)
Re:
It does! If he's being all super!John cause he's still screwed up from the whole "they're all DEAD", then at least there's a point to it. :)

Maybe the vine didn't actually stab him so much as hit him hard in the same spot as he'd been impaled and so it hurt a lot but didn't actually penetrate? (*reaching, here...*)
estel_angel
Jul. 27th, 2008 08:51 pm (UTC)
Excellent fic you can see where John and Rodeney are coming from. Both totally in character
skinscript
Jul. 27th, 2008 10:46 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I can really imagine Rodney being quite "Didn't we train you out of this behaviour TWO YEARS ago??" *laughs*
scifigeek72
Jul. 27th, 2008 11:07 pm (UTC)
Wow...great insight and a great tag.
skinscript
Jul. 31st, 2008 01:46 am (UTC)
Thank you! I needed a good reason for John being so... yeah. Anyhow! I think it makes sense! I am glad you do too.
ceitie
Jul. 28th, 2008 04:54 am (UTC)
This actually does explain a lot about those two episodes for me. It makes sense that John would still be messed up after the events of The Last Man, as well as losing Teyla in the first place.
skinscript
Jul. 31st, 2008 01:53 am (UTC)
You know, it does makes sense that John's got some issues after the events of Last Man, especially since we know that his worst fear is being the reason for the death of one of his team (or, specifically, Rodney). Rodney, all unknowing, probably hit all those buttons simply by saying that John could fix it all by going back - it sort of subtextually implies that John was responsible for everything going wrong by not being there.

Given his already overactive martyr complex, and rampant white knight syndrome, I can see how he would be going a bit nuts about this pressure. I'll be interested if they ever actually *comment* on it. :)
ceitie
Jul. 31st, 2008 03:37 am (UTC)
Comment on emotional repercussions for a character once the events of the episode are over? That's just not how SGA rolls. *g* Weeell, maybe every once in a while.

Also, I agree that John would totally feel responsible for ensuring that this new future goes well, even though it was pretty clear that finding Teyla and her baby using the info from the future would make all the difference. John's presence specifically, might not change anything at all.
adafrog
Jul. 29th, 2008 04:21 am (UTC)
Lovely.
skinscript
Jul. 31st, 2008 01:53 am (UTC)
Thank you!
winter_elf
Jul. 30th, 2008 06:36 am (UTC)
Ohhhh! Love the snappy anger Rodney confronts John with- and that he's not going to let John get away with 'it'. Because yea, obviously John is still dealing with all he learned.
skinscript
Jul. 31st, 2008 01:57 am (UTC)
Despite my huge love for Rodney I find him kind of hard to write, so I'm really glad you liked it and found it plausible! And yeah, he SO is. :) Thanks!
goblie
Aug. 4th, 2008 10:43 pm (UTC)
Ahhhh. This makes me happy. Not just for the little plant dig.

As you know, I too was irritated by the Super!John of this episode, especially considering the Super!John of the last one. I love the guy, but that was a wee bit ridiculous. I hope they calm down with that because otherwise it's just gonna get silly.

ANYWAY. Back to the story. This totally helped make up for what we saw, or rather, explains it in a way that makes *sense* and doesn't have me mad. What a great insight to have John's rescue attempts being down to that.

I also love John's reactions to what Rodney says, throughout this 'cause it's just so... John. I can see the pissed off building and him not really knowing how to deal with the truth of what Rodney says. You do get into John's head awfully well.

I'm not convinced the writers were thinking the same thing as you (though they probably should be :D) but it works on reducing my irritation to the extent that I'm just gonna pretend like this explanation is what they wanted me to get from that. Uh huh. LALALALA.

Anyway, can't write this without mentioning how much I adore Rodney here too, and not just because he's Rodney and I am obsessed. I'm so glad he called John on this - not only that, but he went further and figured out what was going on under all that hair and *then* had something to say about it. *Hugs Rodney tight* I love him.

Also glad that you offered some explanation for the total disappearance of McKay towards the end. I mean, John, you SUCK for doing that (though it wouldn't be out of character for protector!suicide!mission!Shep!) and I can imagine the rage of Rodney 'cause of it; but it makes a lot more sense than "And then... McKay just decided to not show up again for a bit."

So yeah. Good job dude. You cleared up something I was irritated about with a pretty cool explanation - one that gives them depth and *continues* from events they seem to be making an effort to ignore just a bit. ('Cause you know I don't really get John with that bit either.)

Thanks for sharing. :)
skinscript
Aug. 7th, 2008 01:30 am (UTC)
*Going* to get silly? o_O

I was so bloody desperate to have it framed in a way I could actually accept. You know I love John, not just for the pretty, and it was SO infuriating to see him being all ... Gary Stu! I needed a reason. And I think this one works.

I love Rodney. He's such a great way to release my own inner rage. *hugs* him too.

And yeah! What was up with that?? "Sorry, audience. David needed the rest of the week off???" Weird.

Thanks, and of course you're welcome.
( 27 comments — Leave a comment )

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